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Posts Tagged ‘Big Apple’

Bruce Vilanch Emcees The Michael Musto Roast

Thursday, May 25th, 2017

Unicorn Booty
14 Hilarious Reads from Michael Musto’s New York City Roast
Written by Alexander Kacala
on May 23, 2017

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Last night, a “who’s who” of New York City gathered to honor Michael Musto at a roast given in his honor. No, really, who was who?

Comedian Bruce Vilanch was the fabulous emcee for the evening. Rosie O’Donnell opened the show with a few words, roasting Musto by reminding the audience of how their relationship began many years ago.
“I know it wasn’t really a shock to anyone in this room that I was a big fucking lesbian but middle America apparently was confused,” O’Donnell said. “And Michael Musto was a very pissed off fag.”

“Very faggy gay men seem to be very troubled by dykey gay women who refuse to acknowledge their lesbianism,” she went on.

But obviously the water is under the bridge, as O’Donnell showed up to support Musto’s event for a good cause. O’Donnell ended her set by matching funds raised for the Callen-Lorde Center, donating $20,000 to the LGBT wellness center in New York City.

Jinkx Monsoon, Bianca Del Rio, Real Housewife LuAnn D’Agostino and Judy Gold were just some of the notable names on the bill, reading each other and the man of the hour. Del Rio of course was a highlight of the night — and right at home up there, as roasting is what she does best.

The evening was produced by Daniel DeMello and Nathaniel Nowak. Directed by Rachel Klein, many of the night’s best jokes were written for the roasters by Erik Ransom and Matthew McLachlan. Even Musto himself wrote some of the best digs made at his own expense.

Here are 14 of the funniest moments from Michael Musto’s roast:
Bruce Vilanch to United Airways:

“I came in from LA for this. It was incredible this morning as they dragged me off my United flight. Which was really unusual because I thought United only does Chinese take-out.”

Michael Musto to Bianca Del Rio:

“Bianca Del Rio, Hurricane Katrina is only the second worst thing to ever happen to New Orleans.”

Bianca Del Rio to Randy Rainbow:

“I don’t really know who Randy Rainbow is, but from the looks of his name, I guarantee he’s not allowed 800 feet anywhere near a grade school.”

Judy Gold to Michael Musto:

“Michael Musto is Al Franken run over by a pride parade.”

Johnny Skandros to Countess LuAnn:

“You’re the worst thing to happen to music since Whitney Houston started taking baths.”

Bianca Del Rio to Rosie O’Donnell:

“She has her differences with Trump. But she is a lot like Trump. She has five different kids from three different wives. It’s funny, because if Rosie goes ahead and buys another child, she will have to live in a shoe. And with her being a lesbian, can you imagine how fucking ugly that shoe is going to be?”

Johnny Skandros to Michael Musto

“I have to give you a lot of credit, Musto. You somehow survived the ’80s. It’s like your face was the original PrEP.”

Jinkx Monsoon to Michael Musto:

“With all the fashion sense of a hospital out-patient, Michael Musto looks like Ray Romano if he had a much harder life.”

Orfeh to Bruce Vilanch:

“These are scary times, folks. I don’t understand how people can continue to deny climate change in 2017. I mean, the proof is right in front of us! It’s almost summer and Bruce Vilanch’s neck pouch is still stuffed with the acorns he foraged last fall!”

Crystal Demure to Bianca Del Rio:

“Other recommended viewings on Netflix for Hurricane Bianca are ‘Gouging Their Eyes Out.’”

Marcus Kelle to Bruce Vilanch:

“The last time you got fucked was by genetics.”

Judy Gold to Jinkx Monsoon:

“You look like Kathy Griffin had sex with meth!”

Lucy The Slut to the drag queens:

“Look at these drag queens! They look great, but their makeup is kinda like Febreeze. Pleasant, but it’s main purpose is to cover up shit.”

Michael Musto to Jinkx Monsoon:

“Jinx, you do a brilliant Edie Beale impression, except she happened to be talented, not just mentally ill.”

American classic theater, bawdy faves & B’way stars light up the ‘off-Commercial Street’ season in Provincetown

Wednesday, May 20th, 2015

WellFleet
American classic theater, bawdy faves & B’way stars light up the ‘off-Commercial Street’ season in Provincetown
May 20, 2015

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From Eugene O’Neill to Ryan Landry to Broadway stars, The Provincetown Theater’s 2015 season promises to have something for everyone. Both contemporary and early cutting-edge plays, a Broadway concert series, a centennial celebration of the Provincetown Players, a workshop of a new musical and Ryan Landry’s “Thoroughly Muslim Millie” on Sunday nights, there should be more than enough to entice theater-goers to leave the bustle and excitement of downtown Provincetown and flock to the theater’s off-Commercial Street location at 238 Bradford St.

There is even a new downtown box office at Kiss & Makeup, 244 Commercial St., to make it easier to buy tickets.

The season begins with Provincetown favorites Joe MacDougall and John Long in “The Lonely Planet” by Stephen Dietz from May 27-June 7. The play, influenced by Ionesco’s “The Chairs,” explores the evolution of two gay men in an unknown city during the AIDS epidemic. The play won the 1994 PEN Center Award for Drama.

CTEK Arts is presenting the world premiere of “Rosetta,” Candyce Rusk’s musical about Sister Rosetta Tharpe, considered by many music aficionados to be the godmother of rock ’n’ roll. Directed by Margaret Van Sant, working with musical director Clyde Shelby Mellert, this staged musical workshop runs June 11-14.

Beginning June 21 and playing Sundays through Sept. 13, Ryan Landry and his Gold Dusk Orphans, open their new comedy “Thoroughly Muslim Millie” after a sold-out, rave-reviewed run in Boston. Landry recently received the Boston Critic’s Association’s 2015 Eliot Norton Award for Sustained Excellence in Theater.

July brings “Then & Now: A Centennial Celebration of the Provincetown Players.” A group of actors, writers, intellectuals and Greenwich Village bohemians formed a theater company in Provincetown in the 1920s and changed the face of the American Theater. Among the company members were Eugene O’Neill, Susan Glaspell, George Cram Cook and Neith Boyce, all of whom acted, wrote and produced new plays. Because of them, Provincetown became known as the birthplace of modern American drama. The theater presents an evening of short plays by these illustrious writers July 2-18.

A new Broadway Concert Series from R.J. Productions takes the theater in a new direction. The all-star line up includes Lena Hall, Christine Ebersole, Adam Pascal, Anthony Rapp and Telly Leung, Trevor McQueen, Bruce Vilanch and Ann Hampton, and Liz Callaway. “The Provincetown Theater is very excited to be collaborating with Rich Aronson of RJ Productions in New York to bring the community an intimate Broadway Concert Series this summer,” says the theater’s board president Brian Carlson.

August brings the Broadway comedy “Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man,” scripted by Matt Murphy and Jim Brochu and produced by Shawn Nightingale, to the theater. The play is based on the best-selling book of the same name by Dan Anderson and Maggie Berman.


David Mamet’s “Oleanna” plays two weekends in September. Directed by John Williams, the theater is producing the play in conjunction with Cotuit Center for the Arts.

In November, the theater hosts one play, to be announced, as part of the Tennessee Williams Theater Festival. And later that month “The Verge: An Experiment in Feminism,” takes the stage. This was Glaspell’s first full-length play originally produced by The Provincetown Players at the Wharf Theater. Frank Vasello directs.

For the full season line-up go to provincetowntheater.org, call (508) 487-7487 or visit the box office at 238 Bradford St.

Bruce Vilanch To Be Celebrity Judge For The Second Annual Stoli Key West Cocktail Classic

Wednesday, February 25th, 2015

Stoli® Gives Bartenders a Shot at Cocktail Glory with its Second Annual Stoli Key West Cocktail Classic

4-27-2013 4-00-51 AM

NEW YORK, Feb. 24, 2015 /PRNewswire/—Stoli® Vodka, in partnership with the Key West Business Guild, today announced its second annual Stoli Key West Cocktail Classic – North America’s largest annual LGBT cocktail competition. The mix-off sees bartenders showcase their skill and ingenuity as they battle to be crowned the 2015 Cocktail Classic Champion at the Grand Finale during Key West Pride 2015.

Using Stoli Vodka as their primary ingredient, participants in 14 cities across North America will create an original cocktail for a panel of local celebrity judges, who will evaluate the drinks on uniqueness, taste and appearance. Aside from being crowned the 2015 Cocktail Classic Champion, the winner will ride in the Key West Pride Parade as the Honorary Grand Marshall and receive $5,000 for a LGBT or LGBT-friendly charity of their choice.

“It is an honor to host the Stoli Key West Cocktail Classic, North America’s largest annual LGBT cocktail competition,” said Patrik Gallineaux, the national LGBT Ambassador for Stoli. “Our community’s hard-working nightlife professionals often do not receive the recognition they deserve. It is amazing to see what our nation’s bartenders can do with their imagination, their cocktail shaker and Stoli THE Vodka!”

In partnership with the Key West Business Guild, an organization of LGBT-owned and LGBT-friendly businesses in Key West, the competition will be hosted by Gallineaux and TV personality Jai Rodriguez. It will also feature a panel of celebrity judges including clothing designer Andrew Christian; legendary funnyman Bruce Vilanch; actress and singer LaToya London; and Key West personality and star of the annual New Year’s Eve High Heel Drop, Sushi.

“The LGBT community has some of the most inventive bartenders in the country,” said Matt Hon, executive director of the Key West Business Guild. “Through the Key West Cocktail Classic, they’re getting the opportunity to showcase their creativity and put a spotlight on the community. Key West, especially during Pride week, is the perfect stage to recognize them and the contributions they make to nightlife.”

The cocktail classic will take place at 14 events in the following participating cities:

Dallas – March 2
Los Angeles – March 15
Denver – March 30
Miami/Fort Lauderdale – April 6
New York – April 9
Chicago – April 15
Washington D.C. – April 20
San Diego – April 23
Philadelphia – May 5
Toronto – May 7
Boston – May 12
Vancouver – May 14
Seattle – May 17
San Francisco – May 27
Key West (Finale) – June 13

A maximum of seven bartenders will be selected to participate in each local event. For more information about the Stoli Key West Cocktail Classic including how to apply, rules, guidelines and the full schedule of events, visit www.gaycities.com/cocktailclassic.

About Stoli Group USA, LLC
Stoli Group USA, LLC is the North American subsidiary of SPI Group, recognized globally for pioneering heritage and the outstanding Stolichnaya® brand of premium vodkas. New York-based Stoli Group USA reflects significant growth investment in the U.S. market by parent company SPI Group and will drive the brand forward through new marketing, sales and brand innovation. Internationally distributed Stolichnaya vodkas are bottled in Latvia and are known for award-winning flavor and impeccable clarity. Considered a trailblazer in the vodka industry, Stolichnaya vodka defines the benchmark for quality with meticulously crafted liquid that meets the highest Alpha Spirit standard. The Stolichnaya brand portfolio includes Stolichnaya® Premium Vodka, ultra-premium elit™ by Stolichnaya®, Stolichnaya® 100 Proof Premium vodka, the super-premium Stolichnaya® Gold and Stolichnaya® Flavored Premium vodkas including Ohranj®, Razberi®, Vanil®, Citros™, Peachik® and Hot™. For more information visit www.stoli.com or follow on Facebook at www.facebook.com/stoli and on Twitter @Stoli.

About Key West Business Guild
The mission of the Key West Business Guild is to promote LGBT travel to Key West through marketing and the promotion of specialty events; to support gay-owned, gay-managed, and gay-friendly businesses; to strengthen the Gay community’s position within the local community by supporting relevant LGBT issues. The KWBG was founded in 1978 by 8 local gay business owners and has grown to approximately 400 members, which work together to continue efforts to brighten the rainbow over the island, an island now known as Gay Key West. Promotion of events, such as Key West Pride, Tropical Heat and Womenfest, has made Key West a year-round LGBT travel destination.